Apr
0

100 Wise Sayings (Part 1 of 5)

This is not my list nor do I take credit for any of these. As far as I can tell they are pretty anonymous, and pretty close to a poster I once saw in my doctors office about 100 ways to live longer.

Here are the first 20 in a five part series.

100. If you have to fight, punch first and punch hard.

99. Being old is not dictated by your bedtime.

98. Make Goals.

97. Smile at strangers.

96.Your dance moves might not be the best, but I promise making a fool of yourself is more fun tahn sitting alone on the bench.

95. Know the words to your national anthem.

94. Ladies, if you make the decision to wear heels on the first date commit to keeping them on and keeping your mouth shut about how much your feet kill.

93. You are never too old to need your mother.

Continue Reading…

Mar
0

Puns are fun – Punography

Always love a good pun, you be the judge.

  • I tried to catch some Fog. I mist.
  • When chemists die, they barium.
  • Joke about German sausages are the wurst.
  • A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
  • I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop anytime.
  • How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

Continue Reading…

Dec
0

The Power of Your Mind at its Best, Can you Read this?

This text in the image below is somewhat jumbled, but if you let your mind work on it, you can almost read this at normal speed and will probably make you smile when you figure out how your mind can decipher. Below is the translation of what is in the image.

A paragraph that has its letters jumbled slightly Continue Reading…

Dec
0

“Fiscal Cliff”; The Federal Budget simplfied to a Household Budget

Obviously simplifying the federal budget down to household terms doesn’t make a lot of sense since both have very different needs, however one common need between the two is to create a fiscally responsible budget. I found this sign posted and even though it simplifies things down to numbers that are far easier to read, I am posting this without any seriousness, and purely as it made me laugh.

Lesson #1

  • U.S. Tax revenue: $2,170,000,000,000
  • Federal Budget: $3, 820,000,000,000
  • New Debt: $1,650,000,000,000
  • National Debt: $14,271,000,000,000
  • Recent Budget Cuts: $ 38,500,000,000

 

Continue Reading…

Dec
0

7 Reasons Why Studying is Better Than Sex…

Funny little page posted at Carleton University listing 7 Reasons that studying is better than sex, got a bit of a chuckle out of it when I read it, thought it was worth reposting. Content is PG.

  1. You can usually find someone to do it with.
  2. If you get tired, you can stop, save your place, and pick up where you left off.
  3. You can finish early without feelings of guilt and shame.
  4. When you open a book, you don’t have to worry about who got there first.
  5. If you don’t finish a chapter, you won’t get a reputation for being a “book tease”.
  6. You won’t be embarrassed if your parents catch you in the act.
  7. If you aren’t sure of what you are doing, you can always ask your roommate for help!

 

 

Nov
0

Rules on Being a Gentleman

Now again these are not ones that I came up with, but I do agree with the list. Most of these items are free and easy to do.  Currently I am trying to instill some of these into my kids and know the frustration of trying to explain what these mean to a 10 year old because it has nothing to do with MineCraft or some other video game they have no interest in learning.

I know that I will be printing this poster out and putting it on my fridge as a constant reminder, for everyone including myself, as I am sure I can work on the “Don’t Curse” rule.

Continue Reading…

Nov
0

Words to Live By

I have a terrible feeling that before I ever get to show my two boys this list of words to live by, that I will somehow lose it in the piles and piles of documents stored on various machines in my office. Possibly archived and accidentally deleted by some off chance. So to spare myself the horror, I have decided to make the list infamous and post it to this blog. My hope is that some of these which I myself have tested, will save my guys a little of the headache that I endured. Highly doubtful, but worth a try.

Nevertheless here is my list for my two wonderful boys with the hope that some day you read this:

  • Keep your eye on the ball.
  • Turn a loss into a win by learning something from it.
  • Do thing the hard way sometimes – it’s good practice.
  • It is better to ask for forgiveness than beg for permission.

Continue Reading…

Nov
0

Life Hack #3 of 90 something – Condiment Dispenser

Want to be a hit at your next BBQ? Number 3 on our list has us serving up condiments in a unique fashion. Continue Reading…

Oct
0

Life Hack #2 of 90 something – Key Ring Fingernail Saver

Well here is number 2 on our list in no particular order. Not a life changing idea or a game changer, but definitely worth putting on the list since 99.9% of us have Keys and at times nothing could be worse than breaking a nail especially the ladies out their with the $40-60 acrylic nails. Continue Reading…

Oct
0

Life Hack #1 of 90 something – Filling a bucket from a tiny sink

This has probably only happened never in your life, but I had to marvel at the little bit of genius behind this life hack. Continue Reading…